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The Metaphor of a Cupcake Case

Updated: Apr 10



As a play therapist the world of metaphor is a place I live when working with a kiddo. Metaphor is the language of play. We enter the room and step into a world where superman is a baddie, a goose rules a world that lives under the sea and a kiddo can be exactly who or what they need to be.

Kiddos live in this world of great imagination as they see a spaceship in a washing up bottle and this world if given the privilege to enter can provide a therapist with an insight into a kiddo’s thoughts, feelings ad experiences.

I have been placed many times into the role of evil, scary monster for the majority of a session being told to attack, imprison, or harm then in the blink of an eye be the caregiver, doctor or hero to the same character the kiddo is embodying leaving me a little bewildered as to what just happen but then by taking a step back understanding that the kiddo maybe playing out what it might be like at home with an abusive parent or a programme or film they have seen or what a friend has described life to be like and they want to explore what that might feel like. As it is the world of metaphor we will not know for sure unless the kiddo tells us but that is not for me to go digging for. My job is to hold it non judgmentally with acceptance of the who the child is and to be appreciative that they have allowed me to be along side them on this journey.

The world of metaphor always reminds me of one kiddo I worked with that would regress to a pre verbal stage during sessions. This happened for several sessions to which I accepted them for and would reflect their need to use actions rather than words. In one particular tough session they had been playing in the sand tray and I silently watched when they gave me a cupcake case from the play food. I held the case flat on my hand for a moment and looked at the kiddo trying to gain understanding as to what this action might of meant. The kiddo then pointed to the case and then to me. I reflected what I thought they were trying to say of, ‘here eat the cupcake.’ This made the kiddo giggle and shake their head and again pointed to the case and then to me. Still not understanding I stayed quiet and watched the kiddo to continue playing in the sand. They then turned towards me and pointed to the cupcake case and said I was the cupcake case because you hold me when I am in here. Blown away by this statement I smiled and reflected back that they feel I hold them when we are in session. What they had shown in this small action was that they understand that no matter what happens in our sessions I hold them and their journey.

After the session I thought about how this kiddo had experienced my total non-judgement and acceptance of their process so strongly they were able to put it into a beautiful metaphor.

I am a cupcake case that holds the precious cargo of a kiddos process during therapy. I have never been in such ore of what I do as a play therapist and of play therapy as a therapeutic process until that day…I proudly accept myself as the cupcake case!

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